The other day, (before I went to bed, no doubt) I brought up our local news website. I was curious about an article that had been posted earlier in the day, so I thought I'd check up on it before I went to sleep. The problem was that this time when I pulled it up, another story caught my eye. The headline said something along the lines (and I am summing it up) "Man robbed by 3 masked men speaking spanish at gunpoint." "Huh," I thought. When I checked to see where this crime went down, I really disliked what I saw. It's basically around the block from my house. (Keep in mind I live in the country. We don't really have "blocks" and what would be a block is actually kinda far away compared to city blocks). But still. Totally. Freaking. Awesome. Did I mention I've been home alone the past few nights? Great.
It seems to me our quiet little community is becoming less bothered by the amount of crime that's been happening recently. Like this homicide, burned body thing that happened in Santa Margarita. 5 people were arrested, most of them from Nipomo. A couple of the boys aren't even 21 years old. Then a few months ago, a girl from the high school was attacked under the bridge by the hospital. There's been reports of a suspicious van following kids walking to school. A few years ago, people would be talking. It'd be brought up in casual conversation or you'd overhear the concern while waiting in the coffee shop. People used to fear for the direction of our community. Whether a crime was a misdemeanor or felony, it didn't matter. It was happening, here, in our neighborhoods.
It makes me wonder why. Are we becoming immune to the crimes committed, big or small, because it's all over television? Are we becoming immune because it's happening more and more? Are we losing concern because we feel it's out of our control? Is it the growth in our community that inevitably brings more crime?
This little robbed at gunpoint thing has me totally shaken up. It definitely happened too close for comfort. I've barely been able to sleep for 3 nights, because every little noise has woken me up and makes my heart pound. I shouldn't have to fear for my safety, especially in my own home. This sort of thing used to never happen around here. I'm not used to it, and I don't want to get used to it. Our community used to be a really safe place. You could trust your neighbors. You could leave your doors unlocked. And you could let your kids walk to school. I know things change, it's just disappointing that it's happening so rapidly.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Better than me.
Lately I've been finding myself so concerned with others. What they have that I don't. Where their lives are going opposed to my own. What they do or say that supposedly makes them better than me. What qualities make them more approachable. I know these thoughts are no good, and they've just been bringing me down, way down.
I try to give myself a little prep talk, think it through, remind myself of how great I am, what a good person I am, the talents and values I have, etc. This is only works so much, so often. And I've had to reassure myself with these good thoughts more often than I'd like to admit.
But last night I was reading this book, and the author was telling a little story. One phrase in particular really caught me eye. "But I entrust my tree to its God. He who made it knows better what it needs than a man like me. I laid no condition. I fixed not ways or means. 'Lord, send what it needs,' I prayed, 'storm or sunshine, wind, rain, or frost. Thou has made it and Thou dost know.'" (I believe this came from Streams in the Desert by Mrs. Charles E. Cowman).
This is exactly what I need to do, put more of my faith back in the Lord. I have been given a path. It has gotten me to where I am and will get me to where I'm supposed to go. I need to focus less on what others have that I do not. They were given a different path that leads them in a different direction. I need to remember to be patient. Question less and be thankful more.
Of all things, He is better than me. He provides for me, cares for me, guides me and loves me unconditionally. I shouldn't question the things He has put in my life. There is a reason. He created me. He knows what's best for me, and He will lead me.
I try to give myself a little prep talk, think it through, remind myself of how great I am, what a good person I am, the talents and values I have, etc. This is only works so much, so often. And I've had to reassure myself with these good thoughts more often than I'd like to admit.
But last night I was reading this book, and the author was telling a little story. One phrase in particular really caught me eye. "But I entrust my tree to its God. He who made it knows better what it needs than a man like me. I laid no condition. I fixed not ways or means. 'Lord, send what it needs,' I prayed, 'storm or sunshine, wind, rain, or frost. Thou has made it and Thou dost know.'" (I believe this came from Streams in the Desert by Mrs. Charles E. Cowman).
This is exactly what I need to do, put more of my faith back in the Lord. I have been given a path. It has gotten me to where I am and will get me to where I'm supposed to go. I need to focus less on what others have that I do not. They were given a different path that leads them in a different direction. I need to remember to be patient. Question less and be thankful more.
Of all things, He is better than me. He provides for me, cares for me, guides me and loves me unconditionally. I shouldn't question the things He has put in my life. There is a reason. He created me. He knows what's best for me, and He will lead me.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Tipping
I'm all for tipping in the service industry. I used to work in the service industry. You literally live off your tips, because your pay is crap. You're treated like crap. You have to put up crap. It's an all around crappy job.
However it seems like everywhere you go now, you are expected to tip. Like my hairstylist, whom I love. It's $35.00 for a trim or cut. At her old salon it was only $27.00. There I would just give her an even $30. I felt like $3.00 was a good tip. I mean all she does is stand there for like 30 min (if that), chit chat, blow dry, and maybe curl. All that for 27 bucks plus a $3.00 tip seemed pretty reasonable.
Now $35.00 is an odd amount. It's not like $27, where I could just give her a 20 and a 10. If I was going to continue giving her a $3.00 tip, that's a lot of different bills I'm using. It would be a 20, a ten, a five, and 3 ones. It's just so much easier to give her 2 twenties. So not only is she making an extra $8.00 on the cut itself, but another $5.00 for a tip. But to me, $5.00 is a big tip. Especially when I feel like $35.00 is already a lot to be spending on a hair cut.
With this situation, I feel like I shouldn't even have to tip. I feel like $35.00 is an expensive hair cut. She's already making a lot of money off me, why should I have to tip on top of that? With 2 hair cuts in one hour, she's making more in that short time than I make in practically an entire day. And I don't get tipped to do my job. I'm in the wrong business...
However it seems like everywhere you go now, you are expected to tip. Like my hairstylist, whom I love. It's $35.00 for a trim or cut. At her old salon it was only $27.00. There I would just give her an even $30. I felt like $3.00 was a good tip. I mean all she does is stand there for like 30 min (if that), chit chat, blow dry, and maybe curl. All that for 27 bucks plus a $3.00 tip seemed pretty reasonable.
Now $35.00 is an odd amount. It's not like $27, where I could just give her a 20 and a 10. If I was going to continue giving her a $3.00 tip, that's a lot of different bills I'm using. It would be a 20, a ten, a five, and 3 ones. It's just so much easier to give her 2 twenties. So not only is she making an extra $8.00 on the cut itself, but another $5.00 for a tip. But to me, $5.00 is a big tip. Especially when I feel like $35.00 is already a lot to be spending on a hair cut.
With this situation, I feel like I shouldn't even have to tip. I feel like $35.00 is an expensive hair cut. She's already making a lot of money off me, why should I have to tip on top of that? With 2 hair cuts in one hour, she's making more in that short time than I make in practically an entire day. And I don't get tipped to do my job. I'm in the wrong business...
Thursday, September 16, 2010
It's raining Marriages.
I feel like I'm going to sound totally bitter while you read this post, but I do not mean to come across that way at all! I'm simply stating the facts (and maybe venting, a little).
Nearly everyone I know is getting married, if they aren't already. If not getting married, they are engaged. If not engaged, they are talking marriage. If they're not yet talking marriage, they are at least in a relationship. I only know like 3 other single people, and one of them is consistently dating.
Don't get me wrong, I am extremely happy for all of them. It's just weird. That's a place I thought I would be at by now, and I'm so far from it. For awhile there, I liked being single. But that's wearing off. It's really lonely being, well....alone. I don't have someone to talk to before I go to bed. I don't have someone to text throughout the day. I don't have someone to wrap my arms around and love. It just seems those little things are so loudly void in my life, because everyone around me has them.
A few months ago my sister invited me to the Melodrama with a group of friends. It ended up being my sister and her bf, my two cousins and their boyfriends, 2 friends and their boyfriends. I finally just told my sister to give my ticket away. This is the problem with being the only single one. No matter what you do, with no matter the size of the group, you're almost always the odd man out. It would have been fine, but it would have been weird. Had I of gone, it just would have made me more sad and completely aware of the fact that I am alone. It's like everything I'm missing would have been right in front of me, 5 fold.
If I'm hanging out with friends, and a single guy is there. Everyone pretty much knows exactly what's going on, and that's awkward. There's like pressure, and if you start talking, because you're the only 2 single people there and just happen to gravitate to each other, it's like everyone's watching, waiting, hoping. And that's totally uncomfortable! Even if there is no preconceived plan to set you up, it's still weird.
But my friends and family, bless their hearts. I know they all want me to have what they have. Many of them understand the loneliness of being single, when all your friends are in relationships. I know it's not pity. I know they just want for me, what I want for myself. And I know my time will come. I'm not worried about that. It's just sometimes really hard to keep my chin up.
So for now, I will RSVP with one. I will buy a cute new dress and some heels. I will confidently show up solo, reminisce with old friends, and be genuinely happy for the couples in love.
Nearly everyone I know is getting married, if they aren't already. If not getting married, they are engaged. If not engaged, they are talking marriage. If they're not yet talking marriage, they are at least in a relationship. I only know like 3 other single people, and one of them is consistently dating.
Don't get me wrong, I am extremely happy for all of them. It's just weird. That's a place I thought I would be at by now, and I'm so far from it. For awhile there, I liked being single. But that's wearing off. It's really lonely being, well....alone. I don't have someone to talk to before I go to bed. I don't have someone to text throughout the day. I don't have someone to wrap my arms around and love. It just seems those little things are so loudly void in my life, because everyone around me has them.
A few months ago my sister invited me to the Melodrama with a group of friends. It ended up being my sister and her bf, my two cousins and their boyfriends, 2 friends and their boyfriends. I finally just told my sister to give my ticket away. This is the problem with being the only single one. No matter what you do, with no matter the size of the group, you're almost always the odd man out. It would have been fine, but it would have been weird. Had I of gone, it just would have made me more sad and completely aware of the fact that I am alone. It's like everything I'm missing would have been right in front of me, 5 fold.
If I'm hanging out with friends, and a single guy is there. Everyone pretty much knows exactly what's going on, and that's awkward. There's like pressure, and if you start talking, because you're the only 2 single people there and just happen to gravitate to each other, it's like everyone's watching, waiting, hoping. And that's totally uncomfortable! Even if there is no preconceived plan to set you up, it's still weird.
But my friends and family, bless their hearts. I know they all want me to have what they have. Many of them understand the loneliness of being single, when all your friends are in relationships. I know it's not pity. I know they just want for me, what I want for myself. And I know my time will come. I'm not worried about that. It's just sometimes really hard to keep my chin up.
So for now, I will RSVP with one. I will buy a cute new dress and some heels. I will confidently show up solo, reminisce with old friends, and be genuinely happy for the couples in love.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
THAT girl.
You know the one I'm talking about. The one all the boys seem to drool over. Yeah, she's kinda pretty, and she's pretty nice. But you just don't get what the hype is all about.
She's blonde, of course. Her hair is always perfectly styled and never out of place. She's got big boobs and wears the low cut shirts to show 'em off. She's tan with a decent body. Her nails are always done, and she almost always wears heels. She wears a lot of make up and dresses like she's ready for any occasion at any time. She's confident and independent. She's high maintenance, outgoing and flirty.
I am not this girl. Obviously. But you know, I really don't want to be. We all have that girl we feel inferior to. And even though she's a lot of things I'm not, I know I am a lot of things she's not. Better things, at least in my opinion (and really that's all that counts)!
I may be shy, quiet, and unsociable at times. I may prefer to wear flip flops and t-shirts. I may not be flirty and outgoing, but I like who I am. A lot. It's taken me years to even feel comfortable saying that. I've come a long way and learned a lot in the process. I am strong, and I am beautiful - inside and out.
But sometimes I forget that about myself. Sometimes it takes that girl to remind me of who I am and what I love about who I've become.
She's blonde, of course. Her hair is always perfectly styled and never out of place. She's got big boobs and wears the low cut shirts to show 'em off. She's tan with a decent body. Her nails are always done, and she almost always wears heels. She wears a lot of make up and dresses like she's ready for any occasion at any time. She's confident and independent. She's high maintenance, outgoing and flirty.
I am not this girl. Obviously. But you know, I really don't want to be. We all have that girl we feel inferior to. And even though she's a lot of things I'm not, I know I am a lot of things she's not. Better things, at least in my opinion (and really that's all that counts)!
I may be shy, quiet, and unsociable at times. I may prefer to wear flip flops and t-shirts. I may not be flirty and outgoing, but I like who I am. A lot. It's taken me years to even feel comfortable saying that. I've come a long way and learned a lot in the process. I am strong, and I am beautiful - inside and out.
But sometimes I forget that about myself. Sometimes it takes that girl to remind me of who I am and what I love about who I've become.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Tv Land.
A friend and I were at a restaurant the other day. While we were waiting for our food, I picked up one of the little trivia cards they had out on the table. I can't tell you what the question was, but it had to do with some old time Tv show. I quickly stated the answer (as to beat my friend's response), but she just stared at me blankly. She obviously had no idea. "Sweet, I'm already one up," I thought. So I grabbed another card. It was another old Tv show question. Again, I shouted out my answer with excitement. My friend just stared at me. She asked "How do you know all these answers?" I was like "Didn't you ever watch old Tv shows on Tv Land? Gilligan's Island? I Love Lucy?" She replied, "Not really." Are you freaking kidding me?!?!!
I used to love Tv Land. The best shows used to be played at night. For as far back as I can remember, when my sister and I would stay at my Nana's house, that was the channel of choice. We would stay up late with our bowls of ice cream, while my grandpa snored away in his chair. We would watch everything: Gilligan's Island, Green Acres, I Love Lucy, The Brady Bunch, I Dream of Jeannie, Sanford and Son, Petticoat Junction, Bewitched, The Andy Griffith Show, The Beverly Hillbilly's, and our favorite The Golden Girls.
I don't think Tv Land even plays a lot of these shows anymore, which I find a little disappointing. I really miss these old shows! I hope it's not one of those things were I watch them after like 10 years, and think to myself "Omg, this is horrible. How did I ever like this? It's so stupid. Shit like that, does not actually happen. People are not that dumb. I shouldn't have watched this. I should have left it on a good note, thinking about how great it was, but no. I had to go ruin it be bringing back the good times, that have now become bad!"
I think I'm gonna take the chance anyway. You can buy a lot of the seasons off Amazon. I just hope they will be worth the $30 + shipping! Now, if I only I can choose which show to start with! I still watch Golden Girls all the time, because they're everywhere on Tv. Besides, I think I've seen every episode at least 5 times already. I'm thinking of starting off with Petticoat Junction or Green Acres. I remember liking those ones, but I never got to see a lot of the episodes.
I'm actually quite excited to buy these. I can't wait to tell my Nana after I have it. She will be so pumped! We might have to do a weekly movie night, bring back those memories. Nana would love that.
I can't be the only one who used to love all these shows. Have you ever heard of them? Did you watch them and love them? Which were your favorites? I'm really curious, because my friend was pretty much clueless to the fact that they actually excited, besides maybe I Love Lucy.
I used to love Tv Land. The best shows used to be played at night. For as far back as I can remember, when my sister and I would stay at my Nana's house, that was the channel of choice. We would stay up late with our bowls of ice cream, while my grandpa snored away in his chair. We would watch everything: Gilligan's Island, Green Acres, I Love Lucy, The Brady Bunch, I Dream of Jeannie, Sanford and Son, Petticoat Junction, Bewitched, The Andy Griffith Show, The Beverly Hillbilly's, and our favorite The Golden Girls.
I don't think Tv Land even plays a lot of these shows anymore, which I find a little disappointing. I really miss these old shows! I hope it's not one of those things were I watch them after like 10 years, and think to myself "Omg, this is horrible. How did I ever like this? It's so stupid. Shit like that, does not actually happen. People are not that dumb. I shouldn't have watched this. I should have left it on a good note, thinking about how great it was, but no. I had to go ruin it be bringing back the good times, that have now become bad!"
I think I'm gonna take the chance anyway. You can buy a lot of the seasons off Amazon. I just hope they will be worth the $30 + shipping! Now, if I only I can choose which show to start with! I still watch Golden Girls all the time, because they're everywhere on Tv. Besides, I think I've seen every episode at least 5 times already. I'm thinking of starting off with Petticoat Junction or Green Acres. I remember liking those ones, but I never got to see a lot of the episodes.
I'm actually quite excited to buy these. I can't wait to tell my Nana after I have it. She will be so pumped! We might have to do a weekly movie night, bring back those memories. Nana would love that.
I can't be the only one who used to love all these shows. Have you ever heard of them? Did you watch them and love them? Which were your favorites? I'm really curious, because my friend was pretty much clueless to the fact that they actually excited, besides maybe I Love Lucy.
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