Association.

You know how sometimes you just get the itch to go out and since our little town closes down by 8:00, really the only places to go out are bars?  Well, that's what my sister and I did last night.  She actually kinda likes going to the bars.  She likes the...diversity.  I guess you can call it, among other things.  We didn't stay long at either of the 2 bars we went to, just enough to get a fix and make an appearance.  I mean, we were home by before midnight.

Of course, you are nearly bound to run into at least one person you know.  We ran into some.  It's funny to me, out of the people you haven't seen in awhile, who remembers you and who doesn't.  We ran into 5 guys at one of the bars: 1 we didn't know, 2 were in my sisters grade, 2 were in between our grades.  

I was introduced to the two guys in my sisters grade.  One I remembered well, the other I recognized his face, but couldn't place his name.  One guy in between our grades, I had a crush on in high school.  He said hi to me, and that was pretty much it.  I hate that question, "What have you been up to?"  Working.  What else does anyone do?  And really that's it.  I spend most of my life at work, and I'm not going to go in detail about my personal life.  I'm sure he's only asking to be polite anyway.  Besides, I really didn't  care to catch up with him.  The other guy in between our grades, I know.  We aren't friends.  He's just a friend of a friend.  I don't know that we've ever been formally introduced, but he should definitely know my name kind of thing.

I saw two of the guys whispering out of the corner of my eye, and then I get an "Oh, you dated B." (Or something like that, I can't recall how it was exactly said, but the name was mentioned).  Ugh.  Here it goes.  I hate that comment.  Yes, we dated.  Now, it's over.  I have nothing against the guy.  We dated when I was young and at a completely different place in my life.  He is not someone I would ever date at this time of my life.  It was a long time ago.  I am a not the same person.  I really, don't want to ever be associated with him.

But I know it happens, we were together a long time.  Still, it haunts me.  I kinda turned away from the conversation, because I didn't want to talk about it.  But later the guy gave me a little half hug, so I think he understood I didn't want to go there.  I was kinda glad he felt he knew me well enough to do that.  He should.  I mean, I've actually known the guy for years, just not directly. 

It's hard to say too, what kind of capacity people are in when you're at the bar.  Maybe the person you run into is drunk already, and in that case would have a hard time remembering you.  Maybe, they are the designated driver and would remember you clearly.  Maybe, they really do recognize your face and not your name.  You just never know how or why or even if people will remember you at all.