It's raining Marriages.

I feel like I'm going to sound totally bitter while you read this post, but I do not mean to come across that way at all!  I'm simply stating the facts (and maybe venting, a little).

Nearly everyone I know is getting married, if they aren't already.  If not getting married, they are engaged.  If not engaged, they are talking marriage.  If they're not yet talking marriage, they are at least in a relationship.  I only know like 3 other single people, and one of them is consistently dating.

Don't get me wrong, I am extremely happy for all of them.  It's just weird.  That's a place I thought I would be at by now, and I'm so far from it.  For awhile there, I liked being single.  But that's wearing off.  It's really lonely being, well....alone.  I don't have someone to talk to before I go to bed.  I don't have someone to text throughout the day.  I don't have someone to wrap my arms around and love.  It just seems those little things are so loudly void in my life, because everyone around me has them.

A few months ago my sister invited me to the Melodrama with a group of friends.  It ended up being my sister and her bf, my two cousins and their boyfriends, 2 friends and their boyfriends.  I finally just told my sister to give my ticket away.  This is the problem with being the only single one.  No matter what you do, with no matter the size of the group, you're almost always the odd man out.  It would have been fine, but it would have been weird.  Had I of gone, it just would have made me more sad and completely aware of the fact that I am alone.  It's like everything I'm missing would have been right in front of me, 5 fold.

If I'm hanging out with friends, and a single guy is there.  Everyone pretty much knows exactly what's going on, and that's awkward.  There's like pressure, and if you start talking, because you're the only 2 single people there and just happen to gravitate to each other, it's like everyone's watching, waiting, hoping.  And that's totally uncomfortable!  Even if there is no preconceived plan to set you up, it's still weird.

But my friends and family, bless their hearts.  I know they all want me to have what they have.  Many of them understand the loneliness of being single, when all your friends are in relationships.  I know it's not pity.  I know they just want for me, what I want for myself.  And I know my time will come.  I'm not worried about that.  It's just sometimes really hard to keep my chin up.

So for now, I will RSVP with one.  I will buy a cute new dress and some heels.  I will confidently show up solo, reminisce with old friends, and be genuinely happy for the couples in love.